www.locatorindia.com

Well... i am writing after centuries. Sorry, incase you missed me :P . This is a long term project I am working on. Its only an 'under construction' page for the site. Do visit the site and check it out. The main site, hopefully, will be up my this month's end. 

Link : http://www.locatorindia.com

Clair de lune

Well, was busy modeling the moon for the previous image ( Earth! ) but landed up making this. This is a composite of two pictures clicked by me. There is a landscape in the image, but its lost in the night scene. I know the render aint that good... n that is something cause of my camera. The images themselves are noisy. I really need to figure out how to cut it out. As always, I'll need your feedback. :)

Earth!

This is another one from my outer space infatuation. Its incomplete though... please help me with ideas... and a name for it too.

New Born!

Hi. I know its been too long since the last post. Had been caught up with work, rather useless work.

But I did do something useful. This has come after watching hours and hours of Discovery Channel and History Channel. I call it ' New Born! ' . It is a star that's struggling to make its own identity in this immense universe. Just like us. In case you are not aware, a star actually goes through a 'life cycle', where it is born , then lives its lifespan, grows old and then dies. We too are governed by that same law. We say that when someone dies here, he becomes a star. When a star dies, does it become a human?

For the rains...

Finally monsoon's here... what a relief! But honestly it caught me unawares. I wasn't expecting it to rain so soon. I wasn't ready for it. No boots for rain, no umbrellas, no water-proof bags. Nothing! And the rain comes pouring. So here I am sitting in my home staring at the computer, wondering what to do? So, I decided to make a little something for the rains. This image a 3D S Max render. took around 10 min to model and 4 hrs to texture. Though it it is incomplete, just have a look at it. :)

I Believe !

Well, I have decided to publish the images that I create.

The image here is named ' I Believe '. I have actually made this as an illustration for an article with the same title. The author is depressed whenever she hears or a tragic news. She cannot bear the fact that humans can be so inhuman. She wonders how can somebody abandon a new born infant? Or why some believe killing innocent people is a solution to the growing intolerance? How can someone rape a minor girl?... So I have represented this society with a bleeding and wounded heart. But here the author sees a ray of hope when a young childless couple decides to adopt the abandoned baby. When hundreds of people come ahead and help the wounded from a train blast. How the little girl finds courage to face an unjust world... these deeds of humanity and kindness is like a bandaid for this heart. This is what I Believe.

The author's blog : http://gunjan1986.spaces.live.com

Turning over a new leaf

I know very few people know about this blog. And I happened to read through the old posts. What I found out is that, my blog looks so sad. It only got sad stuff. I am a very cheerful person. My blog does not look cheerful. So now on I shall only out up happy stuff. Something that will put up a smile on everyone's face.

Worst month ever !

I'll probably never forget this month... so many things happened... made so many mistakes... lost a very dear friend. Its been a fortnight that I lost a dear friend... I dont know who should be responsible for this? Many a times I feel was it foolishness? Or is it my unnatural ego and unforgiving attitude? Have I started thinking that I am the wisest person on this planet, the only sane human on earth? I made choices that I knew that I will regret for my whole life, I was aware of all the that would happen to me, but then why did I do that ? There is no explanation. I always thought that I am very rational, very understanding, very patient. But I still did things completely opposite. I wonder if I will ever forgive myself, but a loss is a loss. I long to see u my sweetheart, I long to touch you. I know you have the blood of the warrior clan, you will not compromise. But can you be saner that I am. Please save me from my misery. And then comes my mother's illness. I cannot bear the sight. I cannot see her suffer, I find myself so helpless. I often get angry at what's happening to me. I am falling. I am getting impatient.

Gasping for breath, but got no fear

Everyday of my life, I run around to earn a living. To have a better future. I live life the way I want to. All I know to do is sign songs of my misery. My struggle keeps me away from the world. I dont have friends to talk to. I dont have a family to share my worries. Now when I say I dont have friend and family, I mean that I am never there to talk to them or 'be' with them. It is kinda hard, but I never worry. I dont have time to worry! Whenever I feel that I am not what I am, I get scared. But there's something special this time. I have no fear. There is something that has kept my heart aloft. Is it the season ? Or is it someone... all I know there IS something special.

And I so wish I could talk to you today. I've never tried so hard and failed. Waiting for you to come back.

I carry your heart with me

This is for you dear!

I am never without it (anywhere i go you go, my dear;
And whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate (for you are my fate,my sweet)
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
And it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
And whatever a sun will always sing is you

Here is the deepest secret nobody knows
Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
And the sky of the sky of a tree called life;
Which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide
And this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart
I carry it in my heart

-E E Cummings

Its raining money !!! :)

Ever since I joined Convergys, I've always felt good. Although its far from my home, but the pay compensates. I usually dont get to enjoy the money i earn as i need to pay for my anim course, but this month, things are different. I will earn atleast $125 more this month :) .... so with more cash and a credit card, i had an overhaul. Bought 2 new shoes, a new mp3 player with an awesome earphone. And I havent even said anything about the gift vouchers... if anybody (female) thinks I am rich enough , call me for a date.

Where is love?

Where is love?
Does it fall from skies above?
Is it underneath the willow tree,
That I’ve been dreaming of?

Where is she
Who I close my eyes to see?
Will I ever know the sweet hello,
That’s meant for only me!

Who can say where she may hide?
Must I travel far and wide,
Till I am beside the someone who,
I can mean something to.

iRobot

Well , its been ages that I updated my blog... but I finally got some time. My life's become mechanical. Wake up ... work ... train ... sleep. A perfect cycle, any change may disrupt my life. By nature I cannot do anything thats regular, repeating, 'boring'... but thats what my days, weeks, months have become. I am too tired of this life, but I cannot complain. I chose to make it this way. I feel like a prisoner bound by chains waiting for a trial. I console myself with the days about to come. Of a life that I always dream of, to soar like a phoenix like fire in the night sky.... fiery yellow wings beating against the cool wind. But that will not come so soon... I need all the strength that I can preserve. I dont want to fall fighting, I want to win. People say God is unfair when they are in trouble.... I say God gave me this trouble since I can overcome it. I keep waiting.... enduring, like a fallen phoenix, for the day I will rise. I am only waiting... I wake up ... work ... train ... sleep... I have become a robot.. I am a robot... iRobot.

Does she love me too ?

I've never been in such a dilema. For the first time in my life I am uncertain about everything. I dont know what I must do. There is this girl who I've liked ever since I've known her. She's been always on my mind. Now I have very near me. Whenever she's with me I've never felt that she belongs someone else. Never did she make me feel that she that she's commited to someone else. I always think that she is the only one who can understand me as I am. Love me as I am. But does she love me? I was sure that I did... but a recent conversation changed my perception of her. How can somebody love someone and yet not be sure of being in love? I had always been clear in my thinking... but today i am confused... really confused. Please help my love. I cannot bear to live a life this way. I cant say this to you, hope that you may stumble upon this some day.

The best day of my life

I dont remember how many times I must have written an essay about the best day of my life, but they all had been only an imagination. A visit to circus, strole by the lake, an evening by the seashore, ... . But now I really have a best day of my life. I shall never forget the evening of 31 August, 2007. After I finished work, I went off to Andheri with a friend of mine. We had to purchase a gift for another friends birthday. Done with that, I embarked on a journey that I will always remember. I went for a date with a very special friend of mine. I had actually travelled for 2 hrs to meet her at her workplace. And what a journey it was. I had never liked New Mumbai as a place to live in. I find it too slow and laid back. Not my way of living. But let me tell you, its really beautiful. I dont know if it is alway like this, but you will never get to see a rocky hillside covered moss. Tiny waterfalls everywhere. I delight for a nature lover like me. I ws too eager to meet her and was delighted to see her again. I actually had to wait for a long time before I could speak to her, she was busy finishing her work. I had brought a gift for her. No our way to the restaurant, I gave it too her. She was so delighted... and she kised me. I was not expecting it. Was too dazed to think anything else. I dont know what I must have mubled for the rest of the night. Was too happy, happier that I have ever been. Thankyou Tisvuj for giving me my special day.

JB proposes, his 'Friends' disposes

People never believe that i can be busy. Whenever my friends have asked for my presence, I hav made sure that i did'nt disappoint them. But i too have my proirities... I have dreams ... and these dreams are not what everyone can dream of. I am not a common soul. I know I am destined for something big... I can feel it within myself... But such things cannot come on a silver plate, waiting for me. I have to toil for it. I have to fight for it. It is such a strange thing , I never got anything without a fight (now 'fight' here means a struggle) . But i am drifting away from what i want to say. Its about my dear friends. I sometimes feel that they just take me for granted. I donno why i feel so. I love them, yet i feel this way. I am invited only when i cannot go because of prior commitments. Whenever I can, everyone's relatives fall sick. The most interesting thing about this part is that the people who were most anxoius to come (atleast thats how they make it sound), encounter most unexpected tragedies. And when 'my friends' have a ball without me, since i could not come, keep telling me i missed such a nice moment. What must I tell them? I would have loved to come, or they wouldn't have loved if I had come!

Phoenix

Out of my ashes

Will rise a new phoenix

A soaring being

Returning from death

Proving once again

That lifi is eternal

I live for ever

Because the spirit never dies

I will return

In another form, another body

In another time

But its me

The me who is me now

Will always be

As long as i live, I learn

And i live , FOREVER